Merry Christmas: Finding Joy Through the Pain


Merry Christmas Everyone ,

I wasn’t originally going to write today, but I decided to take a few moments to share my personal thoughts on the Holidays. Maybe this piece will be of help to anybody struggling with pain during this Holiday Season. It can be an especially tough time for loss and hardship. Perhaps, rather than letting it bring us down, we can shape it into something that will boost us up.


Finding Holiday Joy Through the Pain

What to Wear

I woke up this Christmas morning, and I couldn’t decide how to feel. I love the Christmas season, but recent life events have made it hard to feel as “merry” as I would like. So this morning I just couldn’t decide whether to jump out of bed and put on a red Santa hat with a smile, or to bury my face in the pillow and sleep the day away in my PJ’s. I couldn’t decide what to wear, so I simply decided to wear the truth.

Wearing The Truth

Like most, I’ve had some big loss and some big heartbreak in my life. From my experience, confronting the truth has consistently been the best first-step in overcoming my problems and getting through the dark times. As I move forward, through the Holiday season, I am making sure to speak and think the truth every day. Sometimes it feels good, and sometimes it hurts. I encourage you to do the same. If you need to scream… Scream! If you want to sing… Sing! And if you feel like smiling from time to time… Then please, for God’s sake– Smile :). Keeping it tucked away will only light you on fire and destroy you from the inside out. Let the truth out, Guys. Everyday. Even if you just write it down or speak it to yourself.

Scrooge That!

There’s always that pressure to conform to other people’s standards and celebrate Christmas traditionally. SCREW THAT! You are the only one who really knows what you are going through, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with celebrating the Holidays in your own special way. Taking control will actually make you feel better. That doesn’t mean skipping Christmas and New Years, it means celebrating them in a way that makes sense to you. Sometimes nontraditional feelings or pain call for nontraditional celebration. Just make sure that you don’t bury your head and dismiss the Holidays all together. This is a special time of year… don’t miss the opportunity to use that to your advantage and start to heal. I am spending the majority of this day studying for a GRE graduate test that I have tomorrow, and I’m okay with that. It makes me feel productive. Maybe I’ll even treat myself to a movie later today. Maybe I’ll take someone that’s special to me. The point is, make the holidays what YOU need them to be. This is your life.

Merry Christmas, Me!

When we really feel down, many times we get down on ourselves. During the Holiday season, seeing so many other happy people and couples can, at times, make us feel even worse about our less-than-perfect situations. Try this: Look in the mirror and tell yourself “I love you,” or better yet, give your mirror self a big wet kiss. Make it genuine. If you feel like you’re not there yet, do something to help yourself get there. Think about what things you do like about yourself– Not surface things, but deep down characteristics. You have them, time to pull them out and start recognizing them.

Time and Action Warm Up Your Heart

Hot Coco would be nice right about now, and maybe a brisk walk to warm up my heart and clear my mind. The old adage is true: Time heals wounds. But only time spent the right way. Things are never fully healed until we take action to heal them. Think of it this way: Time is the bandage, but our thoughts and actions are the neosporin.  The best thing we can do for ourselves during these colder months, is to keep moving. Even small steps will keep us warm, as long as we’re headed towards the sun. Instead of running away from our problems, lets run toward a solution. Let’s find a way through this maze in our minds.

Merry Christmas, All

So yeah, I wish you all a Merry Christmas; but more than that, my wish is that you get the opportunity to celebrate Christmas as you wish. Whether they are traditional or nontraditional, may your holidays bring you love and nourish your soul.

Happy Holidays, Guys.


Digiprove sealCopyright secured by Digiprove © 2012 Garrett Ashe

3 thoughts on “Merry Christmas: Finding Joy Through the Pain

  1. I tried kissing myself in the mirror. It just tasted like glass. I like the introspective holiday writing. I just realized that this is only this past Christmas. For some reason I thought you had been doing the blog thing for longer.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

CommentLuv badge